Hate Apple’s new iPhone battery case? Don’t f*cking buy it


Yes, Apple launched a new battery case for iPhone 6s today, and yes, it’s butt-ugly.

All battery cases are, but because this one has an Apple logo on it, the Internet is getting all bent out of shape over just how ugly it is. There’s one thing nobody is mentioning, though: You don’t have to buy one if you don’t like it — and no one really cares what you think.

To put it bluntly, it’s not easy to polish a turd. Some things are inherently ugly, and not even Apple and Jony Ive can make them look good. Battery cases — which make your otherwise slim and slender smartphone fat and heavy in an instant — are one of those things.

No matter how much you tweet about it, blog about it, or cry about it while looking longingly at photographs of Steve Jobs and remembering the good times, when battery cases like these would have been a laughing stock at Apple design meetings, that’s not going to change.

Complaining won’t change the position of the Lightning port on the Mighty Mouse 2, the way in which you charge Apple Pencil, or the embarrassing mess that is the iPhone 5c case, either.

Battery cases are practical. Battery life on the iPhone 6s isn’t great, and if you’re a heavy user, chances are you rarely get through a full day without having to top up at least once. With that being the case, the Apple Store probably sells a lot of them. It’s no surprise Apple would want a piece of that pie.

It is somewhat ironic that Cupertino would consistently sacrifice battery life in an effort to make the iPhone thinner every year, then release a case that makes the iPhone fatter to give us that extra battery life we so crave. But Apple didn’t do this on purpose just to make more money. Apple won’t make the iPhone 7’s battery life poor on purpose, just so you’ll buy a $99 battery case with your upgrade.

Maybe it’ll get you a retweet, but bitching about the iPhone battery case on Twitter won’t hurt Apple. The company will sell a ton of these to people who need battery cases, and none of them care what you think.

If you hate the Smart Battery Case, just don’t buy one. But please, shut up about it.

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